Never Love Anyone Fully

This song sort of describes how I am. I haven't "loved anyone fully". Well, I have but that's exactly why I stopped. It's probably dangerous considering the fact that I want to get married! Having one foot on the ground is easy, makes sure I won't be hurt. But, at the same time that's what life is about. It's about GETTING HURT. Life is about hard times. But more importantly it is about getting back to the good after something hard. Standing up and having no worries in the world because you know that you learned something from those hard moments. Then, it always seems that the second you get back up something else has to happen. Someone told me just to take it one day at a time. He was so right. It's important to take everything one day at a time, be happy where you are, and understand that everything will work out in the end. All of this being said. I want to switch gears and take this post into a different direction. My grandma isn't doing well. She has had pnemonia for about a month now and her blood pressure has dropped. She is giving up. She is refusing hospice and she doesn't want to be admitted to the hospital. I couldn't be more upset that I have to work right now. I want to fly out right now. I brought up some ideas, but she is in Idaho and I don't think she will like my ideas. I love her so much. She has influenced me so much. She is a wonderful pianist. Some of these photos are from her 90th birthday in November that I got to spend with her because I was nearby. I am so grateful I was able to be there with her! I transferred her to the piano bench instead of her playing in her wheelchair she got to sit on the bench and she played a lot of pieces from memory. It was wonderful. I'll probably be posting a lot about her for awhile. But, I'm hoping I can see her one more time before she passes. We will see. I love her so much. I choose happiness.